What Is Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy and How Does It Help With Trauma?

Understanding Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy

Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy is a trauma-informed, evidence-based approach that views the mind as made up of different “parts,” each with its own feelings, beliefs, and roles. Rather than seeing symptoms as problems to eliminate, IFS understands them as protective responses that developed for a reason.

IFS is especially effective for trauma because it does not require reliving painful experiences in detail. Instead, it focuses on creating safety, curiosity, and compassion toward your internal experience.

What Are “Parts” in IFS?

In IFS therapy, parts are aspects of ourselves that formed to help us survive. Common categories include:

• Protective parts that manage daily life, avoid pain, or keep emotions contained

• Reactive parts that may show up as anxiety, anger, people-pleasing, or perfectionism

• Wounded parts that carry the emotional impact of past trauma

None of these parts are bad or broken. Each developed to protect you, even if their strategies are no longer helpful.

The Role of the Self in IFS

A core concept of IFS is the idea of the “Self” — a calm, grounded state that exists within everyone. The Self is characterized by qualities such as compassion, clarity, curiosity, and confidence.

In IFS therapy, healing occurs when parts feel safe enough to connect with the Self. Rather than forcing change, the process allows parts to relax once they no longer feel alone or overwhelmed.

How IFS Helps Heal Trauma

Trauma can cause parts of the nervous system to become stuck in survival mode. IFS works gently with these responses by:

• Increasing internal safety

• Reducing internal conflict

• Allowing protective parts to soften

• Helping wounded parts release emotional burdens

Because IFS is non-pathologizing and collaborative, many clients find it empowering and deeply respectful of their lived experience.

What to Expect in IFS Therapy

IFS therapy moves at a pace guided by your system. Sessions often involve noticing internal sensations, emotions, or thoughts and developing a curious relationship with them. There is no pressure to share details before you’re ready.

IFS can be used on its own or integrated with other trauma therapies such as EMDR and DBT.

IFS Therapy at Southview Counseling

At Southview Counseling, IFS therapy is offered as part of a trauma-informed approach to healing. Therapy is collaborative, respectful, and centered on helping you feel safe within yourself.

If you’re curious about IFS, therapy can be a powerful way to better understand your inner world and begin healing from trauma with compassion.

What Happens in Your First Therapy Session? A Step-by-Step Guide

Preparing for Your First Therapy Appointment

Starting therapy often brings a mix of relief and anxiety. Many people worry about what they should say, how personal they need to be, or whether they’ll be judged. The first therapy session is designed to help you feel oriented, safe, and informed — not pressured.

Step 1: Introductions and Logistics

Your therapist will begin by reviewing confidentiality, informed consent, and session structure. This includes explaining how privacy works, limits to confidentiality, and how telehealth sessions operate if you’re meeting online.

This portion ensures you understand your rights and feel comfortable moving forward.

Step 2: Discussing What Brought You In

You’ll be invited to share what led you to seek therapy. This can be brief or detailed — there’s no expectation to tell your entire life story. Many clients start by describing recent stressors, emotions, or concerns.

If you’re unsure where to begin, that’s okay. Therapists are trained to guide the conversation gently.

Step 3: Exploring Goals for Therapy

Together, you’ll discuss what you hope to gain from therapy. Goals may include reducing anxiety, improving relationships, coping with stress, or understanding emotional patterns.

These goals can change over time and are revisited as therapy progresses.

Step 4: What You’ll Leave With

Many clients leave the first session feeling relieved or lighter. While deep change takes time, simply being heard in a nonjudgmental space can feel validating.

You may also receive initial coping strategies or reflections to consider between sessions.

First Sessions at Southview Counseling

At Southview Counseling, first sessions are paced with care. Whether you’re starting therapy for the first time or returning after a break, the focus is on creating a supportive, respectful experience that meets you where you are.

How to Know If Therapy Is Right for You (Even If You’re Functioning)

You Don’t Have to Be in Crisis to Start Therapy

Many people hesitate to start therapy because they believe their struggles aren’t “bad enough.” They may be working, caring for their family, and meeting responsibilities — yet still feel emotionally exhausted, disconnected, or overwhelmed. If this sounds familiar, therapy may be more appropriate than you think.

Functioning on the outside doesn’t always reflect how you feel internally. Therapy isn’t only for moments of crisis; it’s also for people who want to better understand themselves, improve emotional well-being, and prevent burnout before it escalates.

Signs Therapy Might Be Helpful

Even if you’re functioning, therapy may be beneficial if you experience:

• Ongoing anxiety or worry that’s hard to quiet

• Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected

• Chronic stress or irritability

• Trouble sleeping or relaxing

• Difficulty enjoying things you used to enjoy

• Relationship tension or communication struggles

• Feeling “stuck” without knowing why

These experiences often signal that your nervous system has been under prolonged stress. Therapy provides a space to slow down and address what’s happening beneath the surface.

Therapy as Preventative Mental Health Care

Just as people see a doctor for preventative care, therapy can support mental and emotional health before symptoms worsen. Addressing concerns early can reduce the likelihood of burnout, anxiety disorders, or depression later on.

Therapy also helps increase self-awareness, emotional regulation, and coping skills — tools that improve not just current well-being but long-term resilience.

What Therapy Looks Like When You’re “Doing Okay”

Therapy isn’t about fixing something that’s broken. It’s about understanding patterns, processing emotions, and learning healthier ways to respond to stress. Sessions may focus on:

• Identifying emotional triggers

• Exploring thought patterns

• Building boundaries

• Improving communication

• Developing stress-management tools

You set the pace. There’s no requirement to share anything before you’re ready.

Starting Therapy at Southview Counseling

At Southview Counseling, therapy is collaborative, supportive, and tailored to your needs. Whether you’re navigating stress, life transitions, or long-standing emotional patterns, therapy can help you feel more grounded and aligned with yourself.

If you’ve been wondering whether therapy is right for you, that curiosity alone is often a sign it may be time to explore support.

Not Ready for EMDR? How DBT Helps Build Safety and Readiness

Wanting Trauma Healing but Not Feeling Ready

Many people are drawn to EMDR because they want relief from the effects of trauma, yet feel unsure about starting trauma processing right away. This hesitation is common — and valid. Trauma therapy works best when your nervous system has enough stability and support to tolerate deeper work.

Being “not ready” does not mean therapy won’t help. In fact, building readiness is often an important and necessary part of trauma recovery.

Why Readiness Matters in EMDR

EMDR is a powerful trauma-processing approach, but it requires the ability to stay present, regulate emotions, and return to a sense of safety during and after sessions. If coping resources are limited, trauma processing can feel overwhelming rather than healing.

This is where Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can play a supportive role.

How DBT Supports Trauma Stabilization

DBT is a skills-based therapy that helps clients build emotional and nervous system regulation. For individuals interested in EMDR, DBT can provide a strong foundation by teaching skills such as:

• Emotional regulation

• Distress tolerance

• Grounding and self-soothing

• Interpersonal effectiveness

• Mindfulness and present-moment awareness

These skills help clients feel more in control of emotional responses and less afraid of intense feelings.

DBT as a Bridge, Not a Detour

Using DBT before EMDR is not a step backward — it’s often a strategic and compassionate choice. DBT helps reduce crisis behaviors, increase emotional safety, and strengthen trust in one’s ability to cope.

As clients gain confidence in their skills, trauma processing often feels less intimidating and more manageable.

Integrating DBT With Trauma Therapy

DBT can be used on its own or integrated alongside trauma-informed approaches like IFS and EMDR. This flexible approach allows therapy to adapt to your readiness rather than forcing a timeline.

Therapy progresses when your system feels safe enough — not when it’s rushed.

DBT and Trauma Therapy at Southview Counseling

At Southview Counseling, DBT is used thoughtfully as part of a trauma-informed treatment plan. If you’re interested in EMDR but not ready yet, therapy can focus on building skills, stability, and internal safety first.

Healing does not require pushing past your limits. With the right support, readiness develops naturally over time.

Now Accepting New Therapy Clients in Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, and South Dakota

I’m excited to share: I am now licensed in the state of Oregon and am currently accepting new therapy clients who live in Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, and South Dakota.

Expanding Access to Online Therapy

Southview Counseling is a fully virtual therapy practice, which allows me to support clients across multiple states through secure, HIPAA-compliant telehealth. Adding Oregon licensure means I can now offer therapy to even more individuals who are looking for flexible, accessible mental health support from the comfort of their own homes.

If you live in Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, or South Dakota, you may be eligible to work with me as long as you are physically located in one of these states at the time of your sessions.

Who I Work With

I work with adults and teens who are navigating challenges such as:

• Anxiety and chronic stress

• Life transitions and burnout

• Emotional regulation and coping skills

• Relationship and communication concerns

• Feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or disconnected

• Trauma

My approach is supportive, collaborative, and practical. I draw from evidence-based modalities, including Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)–informed strategies, Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, and Internal Family Systems Therapy to help clients build skills they can use in everyday life.

What to Expect From Online Counseling

Telehealth therapy offers several benefits, including:

• No commute or waiting room

• Flexible scheduling

• Greater privacy and comfort

• Consistent care even with travel or busy schedules

Sessions are held via a secure video platform and are designed to feel just as personal and effective as in-office therapy.

Ready to Get Started?

If you’re located in Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, or South Dakota and are interested in starting therapy, I would love to connect with you. I’m currently accepting new clients and am happy to answer any questions you may have about the process.

You can learn more or request an appointment by visiting www.southviewcounseling.com and using the contact form.

I look forward to supporting you on your mental health journey.